THE NUT CRACKER’S TALE
[The challenge in cracking a nut is to extract it in its whole form, as we do when forging a friendship. If we fail, it is such a disappointment.]
I can remember at Christmas time a family tradition was the unique presence of a big bowl of unshelled mixed nuts on the living room coffee table, along side a nutcracker.
The family would gather mid-afternoon or after dinner, and take turns cracking nuts. We would watch each other carefully as we sometimes struggled to get the right crack or to get the sometimes tightly packed nut out of its shell. We would laugh when a piece of shell would go flying across the room or into someone’s hot chocolate drink. We would smile at our successes and frown when a robust looking nut was empty, dried up or rotten. Sometimes the nut just wasn’t what it was cracked up to be. Sometimes we conquered the challenges alone and other times we accepted help. There is a lot to learn about life from a bowl of nuts.
When I look at my list of friends, acquaintances, former teachers, classmates, cohorts and employees, neighbours and family members, I see Macadamias and Pecans at the top and Filberts at the bottom. Everyone else fits nicely in between as Cashews, Brazils, Almonds and Walnuts. Each has its unique and welcome qualities.
Every nut and every person is different; some easy to like and others take a bit of an effort; some are hard to fully embrace and others you can only take in small doses or not at all. There are those you like or like for a while, and then you move on believing someone else will take those on. I lean towards the more obviously reliable and predictable, with the occasional dab into the unknown or unwanted.
A diversity of choices and decisions are what spice up a beautiful bowl of anything. Sometimes surprises can be good but then there are the times when we get totally blindsided by a filbert that has been disguising itself as a macadamia. Imposters! Those folly experiences can leave us with a very bad taste in our mouths for a while — I have had one or two of those in this past decade; but, eventually, I step back, shake my head, and jump forward to better options. Imposters aside, each authentic nut has its qualities.
A Brazil nut, for example, is the most stubborn of all — tough shell, tight fit, tough to crack and tough to unload; but, with perseverance, and a lot of patience and confidence, the effort to get there can be worth it. Some people like that kind of challenge and don’t give up. Others may give them a try but, ultimately, just walk away.
A Walnut, with all of its quadrants, can be complicated to crack, bitter to eat and difficult to figure out, especially if you don’t approach the crack or the reassembly of the nut strategically. Somehow it tastes better when after the crack, the nut is intact. They are a lot of work!
The Almond is pretty basic and widely appreciated. It is easy to get along with (with a bit of practice), unless you press it too hard. Whole or half — it is always delightful , mellow and satisfies a hunger.
The Cashew, lightly salted, is always the most cherished and comforting. After all who doesn’t go for the cashew first! They don't disappoint.
The Macadamia and Pecan are consistently good and they are few and far between in our bowl of nuts (life)— hard to find, but worth holding on to. I savour and guard them very carefully.
Although the actual Hazelnut, sometimes mixed up with its cousin the Filbert, looks nice and slick from the outside, its looks can be deceiving. Be very careful and ready — of all the nuts in the bowl, its inside is occasionally dry, rotten or empty. But, every once in a while you get a really good one! As in life, picking a hazelnut can be a bit of a gamble, but it can be a prize too.
The moral of this story is this: Every type of nut has its own character, shape, style and taste. Each attracts different audiences. Some I can either take or leave behind.
Others I just have no desire to try or try anymore. Now that I am 65, I look for quality in my life — things like reliability and trust in a mixture of options.
As a child sitting around that coffee table, I was not allowed to be picky. I had to take what was there and no new nuts were added until the bowl was empty. Over time, I learned that not every nut stands the test, and being picky became okay. What you initially see or think is not always what you expected. The mystery could be a pleasant surprise. If not, spit it out and walk away. It is okay to take charge; it is okay to change the goal posts and it is okay to be flexible..
So at this year’s Christmas table, I am enjoying the Macadamias, Pecans, Cashews, Brazils, Walnuts and Almonds with a happy heart and mind; in the New Year, I will still take a chance on the occasional Hazelnut because they do remind me that nobody can be perfect all of the time — and that is okay too.
I have become a pretty good nut cracker over the years. I have survived the disappointments and thoroughly enjoyed the successes, and am looking forward to another carefully navigated year ahead within a handful of delightful mixed nuts.
Happy Nut Cracking … and may your New Year nut bowl be filled with the finest variety of mixed nuts from this day forward.